Anciauxs aim to give their all in arenas of faith, competition

“Sports flow outward into action from a deep natural impulse that is radically religious: an impulse of freedom, respect for ritual limits, a zest for symbolic meaning, and a longing for perfection.”

Michael Novak

The Joy of Sports

The affectionately-nicknamed “Mamma Jamma” is designed to fit a dozen, but when Nissan made the NV 3500, it wasn’t accounting for Anciaux-sized riders. Yes, it still accommodates the entire family of eight – plus two dogs – but perhaps only because the three youngest Anciauxs are still growing. 

Some brief Internet research reveals that, at 5 feet, 9 inches, Kim is as tall or taller than 98% of U.S. women, but it seems possible that after Adelyn, Greta, and Grady reach their full statures, Kim will look up at every member of her family as she already does with her 6-foot-5-inch husband, Todd; 6-foot-4-inch daughter, Ella; 6-foot-6-inch son, Will; and 6-foot-5-inch son, Nick.

Although airline seats, compact cars, and portable restrooms may prompt some dread, the Anciauxs embrace their statures.

“We’re hard to miss,” Todd said. “People take notice, which helps the kids recognize they’re part of a big family within this community that has helped to form them.” 

Playing sports that value size has proven a blessing for the Anciauxs, he acknowledges, although they learned from the earliest days of little league to have quick and ready access to the kids’ birth certificates to prove they were competing in the correct age bracket.

“As kids, they were treated a little differently sometimes, but sports have provided an avenue to embrace those features,” Kim said. “The size has been a blessing, but they have worked very hard to take full advantage of it.”

“It’s fun being a tall family,” said Ella. “It has certainly provided me with many opportunities.”

Her opportunities have included a basketball scholarship at Wichita State University, from which she graduated last spring with a degree in exercise science. She blazed the trail into major college athletics for Will, who is a redshirt sophomore tight end on the Kansas State University football team, as well as Nick, a senior at Kapaun Mt. Carmel Catholic High School, who has accepted a scholarship to play football at the University of Tulsa next year.  

Will acknowledges he especially gets a kick out of onlookers during family vacations. It can be entertaining to be the first to round a bend and note strangers’ expressions as the rest of the family emerges. 

“It’s pretty funny,” he said. “We fill a pew at Mass as this massive wall of humanity – but I take some pride in being the tallest of them.”

The three youngest Anciauxs are also athletically gifted. Kim notes that seventh-grader Adelyn enjoys volleyball and exhibits a passion for basketball. “She strives to be just like Ella and play in college one day, spending hours in the gym each week working toward that goal,” Kim said.

She goes on to note that fifth-grader Greta is yet to find a sport that she does not love, including softball, volleyball, and swimming, but basketball is also her favorite sport. “Both girls look up to Ella – so much so that when asked what number they want on their jerseys, without hesitation, they chose 13, just like their big sister.”

Time constraints associated with the oldest siblings’ schedules postponed Grady’s start in sports, Kim adds, but now that he has started, he has jumped in with both feet. “He is on a roll now, playing football, basketball, and baseball with his classmates, as well as participating in swim team in the summer,” Kim said. “He got to choose his first jersey number this year too – for baseball – and asked to be 64, an unusual request for a baseball jersey, but he wanted to be just like Nick.”

While the competitive streak runs deep through all of them, the spiritual life seems to be one area in which the older siblings have endeavored to lift the younger ones, which prompts more of the same down the line. 

“Ella and Will both set great examples of growing up in the faith,” Nick said. “They told me to rely on God and really helped build my faith. I try to help with that for Addie, Greta, and Grady.”

Teaching the fundamentals

Another parallel between sports and faith reveals that – old sayings aside – practice doesn’t really make perfect.

No matter how much time one spends in the batting cage, driving range, or on volley drills, no one bats 1.000 forever, finishes 18 holes with a score of 18, or wins every point. Similarly, the saints illustrate that part of growing in holiness on Earth often entails becoming increasingly aware of one’s imperfections.

But even if practice does not make perfect, it’s still essential.

He was a Lutheran and she a Catholic, but a shared perspective about the importance of practicing one’s faith helped create a connection between Kim Glasser and Todd Anciaux when they started dating as seniors at Blue Valley North High School near Kansas City. Their strong initial chemistry and connection endured into college at the University of Kansas, where Kim pursued a pharmacy degree and Todd studied business. 

“As we started to talk about getting married and having a family, faith was very important,” Kim said.

They married in 1999, had Ella in 2003, Will in 2004, and Nick in 2008. Todd was received into the Catholic Church in spring 2007. There was no “Aha!” moment behind it, he recalls, but after several years of accompanying Kim to Mass at the Church of the Ascension in Overland Park, being confirmed as a Catholic felt right.

“It seemed like a fulfillment,” Todd said.

In December 2007, Todd’s job with Commerce Bank relocated the Anciauxs to Wichita, where the family joined St. Thomas Aquinas. Addie was born in 2012, Greta in 2015, and Grady in 2017.

“Moving to Wichita changed our dynamic, our marriage, our family, and our faith life,” Kim said. “There is something different about this diocese and community. Our family would not be what it is today if we were someplace else.”

And that family, they decided, would teach their children well about fundamentals such as prayer, Mass, and stewardship.

Although the Anciaux parents tithe via automatic withdrawal, Todd explains, the children know Mom and Dad give their first fruits to God, even if they don’t visibly drop anything into the tray.

“And we still make sure the kids put money into the tray,” he added. 

“They taught us some allowance could go toward fun stuff, and some to savings, but we also had to give a portion to the Church,” Will said. “That really stuck with me.”

Nor is it limited to allowance, Kim indicates. Addie and Grady recognized an unexpected windfall from last summer’s lemonade stand as a blessing from God. “It was a hot day and they made a ridiculous amount of money,” Kim said. “We sat down together and calculated 10% of that and brought it to Mass.”

Meanwhile, prayer is an activity that extends well beyond the church walls. Nick demonstrated that at age three when the Anciauxs were visiting family friends. “Out of nowhere, Nick started reciting the Our Father, Hail Mary, and the guardian angel prayer,” Kim said. 

The resultant looks suggested that such activities were not a prominent part of their hosts’ way of life, Kim says, but they remain so for the Anciauxs. Along with prayers before meals and bedtime, they pause to pray every time they hear a police or firetruck siren. A couple years ago, prayer was incorporated into the school commute. Addie often leads, but even if she’s absent, the younger kids are eager to take up the mantle. 

“Even if it’s just Grady and me, he initiates our prayers,” Kim said.

And One

Another way in which the athlete’s life echoes that of the Christian? The extent to which the culture of team sports discourages selfishness and blame casting. Just as the Sacrament of Confession forces penitents to consider their own sins and requires them to seek to do better in the future, players are expected to focus on improving themselves without pointing fingers. 

As the oldest Anciaux child, Ella helped blaze the trail for her younger siblings, which included engaging in a variety of sports that reinforced the same team-first ethos she was taught at home. She played soccer, basketball, volleyball, and softball from an early age and continued the latter three sports into her high school years at KMC. 

By the time she was at WSU, basketball was Ella’s sole athletic focus, which – along with the higher level of competition – intensified the thrill of victory but also the agony of defeat. She enjoyed plenty of success on the court, but also faced the athlete’s common trial of doubting that her abilities were consistently being put to their full and best use. Nevertheless, any time disappointment and frustration hit, instead of lashing out, she focused on improving, getting her head right, and leaning on the Lord. 

It helped that St. Paul’s Catholic Center was so welcoming. “I cultivated my faith there,” she said. “I was in a Bible study, often went to Mass there, and got to know Fr. Drew Hoffman. Soon he was showing up for almost all my games.

“Fr. Drew is the best,” Ella continued. “I could go to him when I was struggling. He advised and reassured me. He goes above and beyond for everyone in that community. He didn’t need to get season tickets for my games, but he did, and I’m not the only person he supports like that.”

Ella excelled, but was also no stranger to challenges. The same lessons she had learned as a kid from Todd and Kim about dealing with frustrations held true.

“Instead of blaming coaches or teammates, they always told me to reflect on how I could improve my skills and mental toughness,” she said. “I could talk with the coach, but they didn’t want me to blame others when things didn’t go my way.”

Even so, Ella admitted, the pressure of big-time college athletics created a feedback loop. It wasn’t only a breakneck schedule that included plenty of travel amid a challenging degree program. Slumps, though part of every athlete’s normal ebb and flow, felt crushing. 

“I experienced anxiety that made it difficult to eat, which significantly impacted my ability to practice or play,” Ella said. “Whenever I face issues like that, I always turn to my faith.”

Soon she incorporated a new pregame routine. 

“I would do two French braids while I prayed a rosary,” Ella said. “That sort of meditative prayer really helped.”

College was also a time in which she came to better appreciate opportunities to spend more time in the Lord’s physical presence. “I find the most peace when I am able to take time to just sit in the quiet and be with Jesus in the Eucharist,” Ella said. “One of Fr. Drew’s homilies discussed allowing God to fill our own cups before we can pour ourselves out to others. Sometimes my cup felt so empty. I would sit in adoration saying, ‘Help me understand this situation.’ It filled me back up and gave me the grace and confidence to keep moving forward.”

Sometimes connecting with the Eucharistic Lord was itself a challenge. Ella recounts an extended road trip in which the Shockers were away during a weekend. She and an assistant coach needed a ride to Mass, and so asked the team bus driver to help them.

“People stared and laughed as only two people climbed off our big charter bus,” she said. “After Mass was over, the bus came back and picked us up, which got us more funny stares.”

Now that she has completed her undergraduate degree and begun chiropractic studies in Overland Park, Ella admits that she doesn’t mind the greater free time that comes with moving on from major college athletics. 

“I am really soaking in the greater free time, as well as being able to go about my physical activity and exercise however I choose,” she said. “But my new school has a club basketball team and my love for the game hasn’t gone away.”

Impact player

Whether it’s the lavish, intricate Easter Vigil liturgy or a pre-game routine that incorporates a series of precise steps for suiting up and preparing, neither athletes nor Catholics are strangers to ritual.  

Ella isn’t the only Anciaux to make prayer an integral part of the pre-game routine. For Will, that includes Mass. “That’s a huge part of my routine – being able to spend time with God and away from stress, pressure, and even the game plan – to focus on the bigger picture and give thanks to God,” he said. “I also enjoy the Hallow app before games, which includes things like an athlete’s pregame prayer. That helps me remember everything is about giving glory and thanks to God.”

That he undertakes such preparations before donning the purple and silver may constitute a surprise. As the son of two KU alumni, Will grew up a fervent Jayhawks fan who dreamt of donning the crimson and blue and playing at Allen Field House. Despite plenty of hoops talent, by the time he was a sophomore tight end at KMC, Will began to recognize his greatest prospects appeared to be on the gridiron. 

“I was excited to take advantage of those opportunities, which stirred a new love for football,” he said. 

A two-time KMC team captain who was placed on numerous publications’ all-league and all-state teams in his last two years of high school, Will was a highly prized recruit sought by numerous Division I programs, including KU and KSU. 

Will’s recruiting visit to Lawrence was nice, Kim recalls. “They knew Todd and I were Jayhawks,” Kim said. “They also knew our Catholic faith was important, so they showed us around the St. Lawrence Center and introduced us to the priests.”

It was a good visit, Will agrees, much like the visits to other schools. But his visit to KSU’s St. Isidore’s Catholic Student Center set the school apart. “St. Isidore’s was one of the bigger deciding factors in my decision to go to Kansas State,” he said. “It’s such a beautiful place, with a vibrant, active community.”

Strengthening that tug toward the Wildcats, Will notes, was KSU Head Football Coach Chris Klieman’s extra effort to make sure Catholic players and coaches could easily make it to Mass. “He arranges for players to have Mass when the team is traveling,” Will said. “Every Mass, Coach Klieman and his family are the first ones in there.”

The same is true for the intense initial weeks of practice at the start of each season. Despite a rigorous schedule that Will describes as “a dayless month,” Catholic players are reminded of the Sunday obligation when they see a priest in the football facility for Mass. 

“Coach Klieman is a servant leader who puts the needs of others before his own,” Will said. “I really appreciate that he knows it is important to have time with God.”

Will is by no means the only Wildcat to recognize that. Common faith is a bond that not only helps strengthen team ties, he reflects, but also reinforces that faith. “We bring each other along,” Will said. “Four of us in the tight end room are Catholic, and it’s really encouraging for me and my fellow teammates to be able to walk with and help each other out through the journey.”

And like Ella, Will is mindful of the power of example with regard to his younger siblings. He acknowledges that one of the features that set his senior year at KMC apart was suiting up with Nick. “That was the first time we had ever played on the same team, and it was super special for me,” Will said. “I wanted to be a good role model for him and show him how to do things the right way. It was fun having him at practice or on the sideline during games, and I’m glad we got to share that at least once in our lives.”

“It was cool seeing him in his element,” Nick said. “I could really see his leadership and his love for the game. He taught me how to be intentional with everything: You practice like you’re going to play. You lead others like you want to be led. I learned a lot from him.”

Will said he also learned a great deal from another mentor, Fr. Curtis Hecker, who was KMC’s chaplain during Will’s time there.

“Fr. Curtis had one of the largest impacts on my faith as anyone,” he said. “Without him, I would not have been able to dive as deeply into my faith during high school. The Kairos retreats were phenomenal, and I can’t thank him enough. I am very grateful for the huge impact he’s had on my life.”

In the Trenches

How about another way in which the sporting life, specifically football, seems to echo the life of faith? 

If bishops, priests, and religious occupy the most visible positions – the Church’s head coaches, coordinators, quarterbacks, running backs, and wide receivers who garner the headlines and highlights – then many of the lay faithful arguably play on the offensive line. And as many coaches and stars insist that their success depends on good blocking, many a bishop, priest, or mother superior will point to the critical spiritual influence of strong Catholic families, faithful teachers, and devout gray-haired couples praying yet another rosary. 

“The offensive line is like air conditioning,” Nick said. “Most people never notice it unless it’s not working.”

Since he entered high school at the same position as his older brother, Nick absorbed everything he could from Will about playing tight end. Nick hoped to continue following in Will’s footsteps at one of football’s most versatile offensive positions. However, when he began his junior season in fall 2024, the Crusaders needed help on the line. 

“I had to swallow my pride a bit,” Nick said. “People usually notice when a tight end makes a big play with a touchdown or important catch. I wanted to do those things.”

Moreover, Nick’s 220 pounds were sufficient to give a high school tight end realistic hopes of playing at the next level, but he was way too light for a college offensive tackle. Still, the Crusaders needed offensive lineman, and Nick wanted to help the team.

“I spent a lot of time in the weight room,” he said. “I also enjoyed Mom’s cooking and Dad’s hamburgers.”

But there were no guarantees. The undersized, inexperienced Nick emphasized his strong points, such as quick feet and ability to move in space. At the same time, he strove to build up the physicality required to compete in football’s trenches, and now weighs about 270 pounds.

And though Nick had to die to self by moving to a position in which it’s usually against the rules to touch the football, it also initiated him into the unique brotherhood of offensive linemen. 

“Offensive line is the only position in which players spend the whole game with their backs to the ball,” Nick said. “It’s really about working for something bigger than yourself. It’s having a common goal with those four other guys on the line with you, knowing that you can trust the guy next to you to do his job and that he can trust you to do yours.”

However, to a great extent, he had internalized his older siblings’ high athletic standard. Even if he could tell others appreciated him as his own person, Nick’s own expectations were a source of immense internal pressure.  

As his junior year began, he equated much of his value with how he played. “I wasn’t happy,” Nick said. “I was only as good as I performed on the field, and my performance really defined who I was as I tried to pursue my dream of playing college football. The quote about how ‘Comparison is the thief of joy,’ was true for me. It got pretty tough toward the end of the season and I kind of lost my sense of identity. Then I realized I should find my identity in God’s love, who he made me to be, and my own mission in life.”

The process was both gradual and sudden, Nick says.

Many of the seeds planted at home and in his grade school days at St. Thomas Aquinas had sprouted and grown almost imperceptibly. “St. Thomas Aquinas did an amazing job forming the faith within us,” he said. “The teachers and priests there were great, especially Fr. Matt McGinness, who does a great job with the youth.”

And then one day, that plant bloomed. 

“It took an enormous weight off my shoulders to know God made me to be exactly who I am so I can live my best life rooted in his love,” Nick said. “Realizing that even felt like it comforted my younger self and healed a lot.”

Kim and Todd noticed. She was pleased when Nick had the opportunity to attend one of the three-day, two-night Kairos retreats KMC makes available for members of its junior class, which Will had also done during his junior year. Kairos – which translates to “right time” – hit at precisely the right time for Nick.

So much so, he says, that it awakened a hunger to show the same sort of spiritual leadership he witnessed from KMC’s senior peer ministers who helped lead his retreat.  

“It speaks tremendously well of the campus ministers at Kapaun that he saw it as something he wanted to be part of,” Kim adds. 

Will had been a peer minister during his senior year at KMC, and as part of the first set of peer ministers to lead Kairos retreats, had blazed a trail. Even so, Nick did not so much follow Will’s trail into peer ministry as forge his own path. 

Nick recounts sitting before the ministry board during the application process, and acknowledging how much the self-imposed pressure to excel in athletics had cast a long shadow until he embraced his primary identity in Christ. “I talked about it during the interview,” he said. “Others are probably going through something like I was, comparing themselves to others and being unhappy with who they are because they don’t realize their worth is really found in God’s love and who he made them to be. Helping even one person going through something similar would make it all worth it.”

“To say ‘it was only a game’ is the psyche’s best defense against the cosmic symbolic meaning of sports events. And it is partly true. For a game is a symbol; it is not precisely identified with what it symbolizes. To lose symbolizes death, and it certainly feels like dying; but it is not death. The same is true of . . . baptism or the Eucharist; in both, the communicants experience death, symbolically, and are reborn, symbolically. If you give your heart to the ritual, its effects upon your inner life can be far-reaching.”

– Michael Novak

The Joy of Sports